I'm off to Toledo for the Fourth of July weekend. In honor, I thought I'd share the following I came across...
Have a great long weekend! I can't wait to sleep in :-)
You Know You're from Toledo When...
1.) You're tired of hearing about Katie Holmes.
2.) You refuse to call it Westfield Shopping Center, because we all know it is really Franklin Park Mall.
3.) You've had a Rudy's hot dog, and have concluded with the rest of Toledo that it's really not that great.
4.) You freeze your butt off walking around the Toledo Zoo at 10 degrees because you want to see Christmas lights.
5.) You know how to drive in snow, rain, and hail.
6.) You know where the original Tony Packo's is at and you know what type of food famous people sign on the walls.
7.) If you see a driver who's driving erratically, you automatically check for the Michigan license plate.
8.) You know what Magic Wok is.
9.) Visiting Cedar Point is a tradition dating back to the elementary school years.
10.) You have a favorite room in the Toledo Art Museum.
11.) You know who Jamie Farr is.
12.) Cosi was a yearly class field trip.
13.) You graduated at the Stranahan.
14.) You know what Krogering is.
15.) You felt cool going to Ohio Skate on weekends as a kid.
16.) Your school was cancelled because of the 7 inches of snow you got during the night.
17.) You remember when Toledo didn't have ANY Wal-Marts.
18.) "Everybody's Zooing It" means something to you, and you can sing the song, weird accent and all.
19.) Seeing a giant, neon-colored, plastic frog sitting on the sidewalk is nothing unusual.
20.) You're so used to driving in construction that you feel odd driving where you can't see orange barrels.
21.) You know what Meijer is.
22.) You've been to a Mud Hens game.
23.) Your mayor decides to change the fire hydrant color.
24.) You get stopped by a train almost daily.
25.) You think having four all-girls and boys Catholic high schools in one city is normal.
26.) You know that Smurf ice cream is the only flavor worth eating at Mr. G's Barn.
27.) Your mayor has gotten into almost-fist-fights with people.
28.) You get into a legal jam and call Sam Bolotin.
29.) You'd rather drive an hour to Detroit than fly out of Toledo Express.
30.) You hate The Blade, but read it anyway.
31.) You miss Dave Carlson and now believe the weather is no longer the same.
32.) You know where to get the best Mexican/Chinese/Italian/Pizza, but still proclaim Toledo is running out of good restaurants.
33.) You can finish this Banner Mattress commercial: "No gimmicks, no tricks till 200_"
34.) You got confused when they added onto the mall.
35.) You agree Toledo is "a great place to raise a family" but you want to get the hell out as soon as possible.
36.) You're torn between rooting for BG or UT.
37.) You know of at least 3 clubs downtown, but are too afraid to go to any of them.
38.) You know Major Magic's was way better than Chuck E. Cheese's.
39.) You know what Q-Zar is and have a favorite team color.
40.) You have gotten or almost gotten a ticket in Ottawa Hills.
41.) You have at least one Race for the Cure t-shirt.
42.) You judge people by which Kroger's they go to.
43.) You know where the only White Castle in Toledo is.
44.) You remember the tunnel that used to go to the zoo and have jumped on the metal hatch at least 6 dozen times.
45.) It's not mini golf. It's putt-putt.
46.) You have four network TV news stations, but you only take two of them seriously.
47.) You know your choice in colors on OSU vs. Michigan day cuts out any decent conversation with half of your friends, because unlike most of Ohio towns, Toledo is 50% Michigan fans 50% Ohio State fans.
48.) You go to Michigan regularly and enjoy it even if you hate the team.
49.) You are used to food festivals (German, Polish, Irish and every other festival) and go to them even if you aren't of the nationality.
50.) You can explain snow and every other weather pattern.
51.) You drive around Sylvania because you know the neighborhoods with the best Christmas lights!
52.) You know why Toledo is called the "Glass City".
53.) Mentioning Telegraph Road conjures images of adult bookstores and strip clubs.
54.) You know that one of the most important battles ever to take place on the North American continent was the Battle of Fallen Timbers, yet they want to make the ground into another stupid mall.
55.) You can pronounce Maumee correctly.
56.) You know the best place in the world to buy cakes is Wixey's Bakery.
57.) You know what speed to drive on the Trail at night so that you never have to hit the brakes.
58.) You overheard at least one panicked conversation after the 9/11 attacks about how Davis-Besse was going to get blown up.
59.) You know and can explain what a buckeye is.
60.) Ending up in Michigan after taking a wrong turn does not incite panic because it's like going across the street.
61.) You remember Southwyck BEFORE it fell apart and became empty and crappy. Or you've even HEARD of Southwyck.
62.) You will always call MUO "MCO" and your parents will always call UT "TU."
63.) You wouldn't eat a fish from the Maumee River, and you wouldn't EVER swim in it.
64.) No matter what the story is, whether it's about a man from Japan or a tornado in Oklahoma, the news stations always find someone in Toledo who can relate or has been affected by it.
65.) You what they are referring to when they sing "There goes another one."
66.) You've paid less than $5 to park downtown for an entire day.
67.) You know what school a guy attends when he's referred to as a Frannie or a Johnny.
68.) You are well aware of the fact that there are three Kroger's along Glendale Avenue within 3 miles of each other.
69.) Macy's is still Marshall Field to you, or Marshall Field is still Hudson's. You also remember when Dillards was Lion.
70.) You remember when National Amusements didn't have a price-controlling monopoly on Toledo's major theaters.
71.) You claim that you hate going to the Jamie Farr (now Owens Corning) Classic at Highland Meadows, even though you really love it.
72.) You've met Marcy Kaptur.
73.) You can correctly answer the question on Trivial Pursuit Millenium Edition, about naming the mayor of an Ohio town that wanted to pass legislature to have all the deaf people moved out by the airport. THEN WE RE-ELECTED HIM!
74.) You know not to drive down Lagrange Street by yourself at night.
75.) You know who Walt Churchill is and remember Churchill's Supermarket.
76.) You know that when someone wants to be taken to St. V's, it's not a good thing.
77.) You tried to call a radio station and Johny D hung up on you.
78.) You hear "Springfield" and you know it has nothing to do with the Simpsons.
79.) You know that Spring Meadows has nothing to do with spring or meadows.
80.) Your childhood memories include riding the carousel at Southwyck Mall (before it got scary and empty).
81.) You remember when the Big Boy on Secor Road disappeared.
82.) A two bedroom apartment for $400/month is expensive.
83.) You've been on the Ohio Turnpike and don't mind paying the $0.50 to drive from the airport to Maumee because you know it will save time.
84.) You can remember the mummy being in the Egyptian room at the museum.
85.) You live in a suburb, but say you're from Toledo.
86.) The candidates for most elections are a party-endorsed Democrat and a Democrat running as an independent.
87.) You know that it's actually called Kroger but always say Krogers.
88.) You've been involved in or witnessed a fight break out at the Franklin Park Cinemas.
89.) You can drive 50mph through I-280's 35mph construction zone and know when to slow down cause there's usually a cop around the bend.
90.) You know that the BEST place to buy corn and strawberries is Monnette's Market!
91.) You frequently avoid seeing movies until they go to Super Cinemas and you can see it for $2 instead of $10.
92.) You think nothing of it when it snows one day and the day after, it's 70.
93.) You realize 1/3 of the population of Toledo has a Toledo Zoo sticker on their vehicle.
94.) You agree with John Denver that 'Saturday night in Toledo, Ohio is like being nowhere at all.'
95.) You measure distance in time and not miles.
96.) You know the slogan 'Toledo Loves its Jeep' and it means something to you.
97.) You remember those Affordable Chiropractic commercials where the guy always played the guitar.
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6 comments:
It's all true! Except for the stuff about Southwyck Mall--I wouldn't know, it was always too far of a drive or too scary to shop there :) PS, have you seen Northtowne lately? Talk about abandoned...
Yes! this is fun!!! Oh Toledo
You know you're from Cincinnati when...
You don't care about Toledo. :-)
screw u cincinati THIS WAS FUNNY
I'm from Toledo and could relate to quite a few things. My mom will get a kick out of this!
#98) You think there's a big difference between Toledo and Cincinnati.
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