Gym Etiquette

At the risk of writing two very complain-ish posts in a row, I feel the need to provide some guidance to men at the gym. The gym to which I belonged in Lakewood had a "ladies only" room. A room where women could lift weights away from the wandering eyes, nasty grunting, and "macho" music blaring in the regular free weights area--an area occupied mostly by men. While I worked out there, I thought it was ridiculous that there was a women's side and a men's side. Separate but equal is unconstitutional, right?

I was wrong.

Generally, I work out in the morning before work, but on Mondays, I hit up the gym after work to lift and it is probably the most crowded the gym ever gets. There is a waiting list for treadmills, it's sickeningly hot when you walk in the door, and the free weight area is over populated with the i-can't-touch-my-finger-to-my-face-because-my-bicep-is-so-big types. I tell you what, I miss the ladies weight room.

It's like there's some kind of sexist, unwritten rule that women can use the cardio equipment, the circuit machines, but NOT the free weights. That's male domain...women out. Or, if you want to take the risk of venturing into the man territory, you have to accept that you will be subjected to stares and workout "advice" from most of the men back there. It's completely ridiculous.

So, men, here's 8 pieces of advice for proper gym etiquette.

1. Grunting does not make you appear stronger. Stop putting on the act.
2. Doing 4 reps of extremely heaving weights and then walking around for 10 minutes "resting" and still occupying a bench with your towel is ridiculous: not only are you a bench hog, but you aren't doing that much for your muscles either.
3.I was a college athlete. I know how to lift. I do not need your "tips" on how to get the most out of my lunges, or the newest protein shake. If I want exercise tips, I will get a subscription to Shape magazine.
4. If you sweat all over a bench, for goodness sake, clean it off. I think people would appreciate not having to be exposed to whatever infectious diseases you may be carrying.
5. Throwing down your weights in order to make a loud sound after your set of reps does not make you appear stronger. See number 1.
6. Just because you use the mirror to check out women instead of turning and looking at them doesn't mean we can't see you. You are not sly.
7. After doing your 1 set of 4 reps with 300 lbs on the bench press, it'd be nice if you would remove the weights. It'd be nice to get a workout from actually doing my routine, rather than from moving around other people's weights.
8. Just because you look in the mirror to check out your muscles doesn't mean we can't see you checking yourself out. See number 6.

Ok, I'm done now. No more complaining :)