My Take on The Holiday

I've found almost everything ever written about love to be true. Shakespeare said "Journeys end in lovers meeting." What an extraordinary thought. Personally, I have not experienced anything remotely close to that, but I am more than willing to believe Shakespeare had. I suppose I think about love more than anyone really should. I am constantly amazed by its sheer power to alter and define our lives. It was Shakespeare who also said "love is blind". Now that is something I know to be true. For some quite inexplicably, love fades; for others love is simply lost. But then of course love can also be found, even if just for the night. And then, there's another kind of love: the cruelest kind. The one that almost kills its victims. Its called unrequited love. Of that I am an expert. Most love stories are about people who fall in love with each other. But what about the rest of us? What about our stories, those of us who fall in love alone? We are the victims of the one sided affair. We are the cursed of the loved ones. We are the unloved ones, the walking wounded. The handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space! Yes, you are looking at one such individual. And I have willingly loved that man for over three miserable years! The absolute worst years of my life! The worst Christmas', the worst Birthday's, New Years Eve's brought in by tears and valium. These years that I have been in love have been the darkest days of my life. All because I've been cursed by being in love with a man who does not and will not love me back.

-Iris, The Holiday


Have you ever loved somebody who didn't love you back? I have and it SUCKS. I spent nearly 2 years believing someone who had fallen in love with me (and fallen out of love with me) would suddenly want me back. We'd go back and forth, back and forth...and it was just such a waste!

We've got to get past wanting somebody so badly it becomes desperation. We've got to stop making excuses for men (or women) who fail to pursue us, but linger around enough to keep us interested. We have to stop waiting for them to become the men we think they can be....or wish they were. We have to discover that chasing after a man who's not chasing you, is well, worthless...and a waste of our precious time.

It's hard though. We get infatuated and caught up in the whirlwind. We see past the bad things this individual does as soon as he does something sweet. One considerate moment covers 100 inconsiderate ones.

But, I believe, ladies...we are created to be pursued and chased after. I don't want to be the one seeking...I want to be the one being sought.

And maybe that means I will be dateless, or maybe that means men will be intimidated by me...but it sure beats engaging in a one-sided love affair, pining after a someone who hardly thinks of me.

Besides, if by next Christmas I'm still single, I'm doing a house swap with someone in England and will meet my own version of the surprisingly-hot-and-sweet-Jude Law in this movie :-)